Silence
by NekoNekoMinako
Summary: A songfic for Akako Hama. Done to the song "Silence" by Aly & Aj.


Minako: Alrighty! A requested fic for the ONLY person who put a story idea WITH their guess on the little quiz at the end of "Just a Weapon." So, Akako Hama, this is for you!!

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Disclaimer: Don't own song or Storm Hawks

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Silence

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Aerrow sighed, looking out the window of his room - it was raining, so that pretty much meant everything except sitting around doing nothing was out of the equation. He had escaped to his room and locked the door, mostly because that's what everyone else did to get away from Finn's crazy rantings of being bored. He had told everyone else he was going to take a nap, but really...he was just thinking...though, his thoughts were straying into dangerous (but not unwanted) territories. What could have gotten everyone's favorite little red-head so down? Let's see - he's tall, dark, handsome, red eyes, black hair...did I mention he's a Talon? If you haven't guessed by now, it's none other than his greatest enemy, Dark Ace. Thoughts swirled through Aerrow's mind, most of them making him wonder just how crazy he was going. Seriously, he couldn't _like_ the man the way he did...could he? They were enemies, so he _couldn't_ like him...right? Those are just a couple of the many questions currently giving him a headache at the moment.

_I'll bet two years I'll bet one year_

_I'll bet those years you won't be here_

_I guess I'll keep, I guess you'll keep_

_Every memory_

_Sadly we may never be_

It wasn't too many years ago that Aerrow looked up to the Dark Ace - this was back when said man was part of his father's squadron, the original Storm Hawks. Really, back then Aerrow made him one of his two role models, one being his father, of course. He was completely crushed when he learned of the betrayal, and that changed him forever. Yet, he still couldn't bring himself to completely hate the man - he must have had his reasons for doing this. Maybe Cyclonis threatened him with something - the death of a close person, or maybe they injured him so badly they would only cure him if he betrayed his squadron. Whatever it was, Aerrow knew deep in his heart Dark Ace just _had_ to have had a good reason for doing that. Sure, it still hurt, but he swore the day he found out about his father's death he would figure out _why_ it happened. Screw the how, the what, the when, all that other stuff - he just wanted to know why. Green eyes widened when a tear slipped down his face - he hadn't even noticed the drops were forming.

_I'll bet my tears I'll bet your tears_

_I'll bet those tears over time could disappear_

Maybe, if things had been different...if they had been closer in age, or on the same side, or...whatever! Maybe then they could've worked somethng out! Maybe Aerrow's father would still be alive! All those "maybes" formed a tornado, a whirling cyclone that shattered when it hit one thing - the truth. This was how it happened, this is how it's going to play out, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it...well, unless you're the Orcale, or some random god, but that's beside the point. Aerrow stared at his reflection in the window - the rain fell down the glass, concealing the tears he knew were falling down his face.

_Wait a minute I have more to say_

_and I care if you're listening to me_

_I need you more than you'll ever know_

_I still do, willing to let it show_

He remembered one time when he was younger - it was his birthday, and the entire squadron had come over to celebrate with him. He remembered Dark Ace's gift for him - a scrapbook he had made of all the pictures of Aerrow and the others. Aerrow squealed and glomped him, saying a thousand "thank you"s and getting a laugh from the others at the small party. Dark Ace had smiled and ruffled his hair playfully, prying the child off of him. Reaching down to the small compartment beneath his bed, Aerrow grasped the worn book, bringing up to look at. He remembered all the happy times back then, and wished they were still happening - he realized it long ago that he just _needed_ the man, just wanted him to be beside him, not fighting him at every meeting. More tears slipped from his eyes, falling onto the cover as his eyes squeezed shut. He briefly wondered if anybody up there really gave a damn about how he felt - if they did, then why would they let him hurt like this? Why didn't they do something back then, "divine intervention" or something! Only Aerrow knew how many times he had softly cried himself to sleep at the thought of the one thing he could never have...actually, it had been so many times, he'd lost count.

_I need a minute just to get to you_

_I feel like I might be getting through_

_Come over and say nothing_

_Silence is everything (oh)_

Every day Aerrow had to bite his tounge (sometimes literally) to keep from snapping whenever one of his friends said something about Dark Ace - it was usually something bad or degrading. Keeping his true feelings in check, he'd just laugh with them, agree with whoever had said it, then cry about it later when he was alone. Gods, it hurt so much to lie to them, but they'd hate him if they knew. There were so many times he wished he'd die, just so he could escape the pain he felt every single day. Lighting strike him down right now, but he would admit it a thousand times over - he was in love with the Dark Ace. It wasn't just some "school kid crush," as many would put it. No, he knew he was truly in love with the man...Why did he suddenly feel like this was turning into a "Romeo and Juliet" scene? Oh, right - because they're on opposite sides of the war and can never bee together, even if they wanted to be. And if they were, they'd have to hide away from the prying eyes of civilization, trick people into believing something had happened...but, wait a minute, Juliet tried to trick everyone before, and it just ended up killing both her and Romeo...Was that their fate? His and Dark Ace's? He laughed dryly - as if that would ever happen.

_I know, I know (I know, I know)_

_Feelings can show_

_If you let go-oh-oh-oh_

_It must be told (it must be told)_

_I've got a hold_

_On what we used to have_

If only he could turn back the clock, stop Dark Ace from betraying his father, stop EVERYTHING that would have come between them...Wishful thinking, he knew, but he couldn't help it. He longed to just embrace the man, kiss him...if that weren't possible, he'd be content with just being able to talk with him, other than the "threats" they made to each other in the heat of battle. Aerrow clutched the old scrapbook to his chest, as if he was trying to absorb all the good memories that it held. All the happy times he shared with the man who was now his enemy. All those precious moments he wished he could relive. He eventually cried himself to sleep, just like all the other times, grasping at fleeting moments of happiness that remained in his dreams, in his memories.

_I will forgive if you forget_

_All the things we said_

_Let's accept it_

_I need you, more than you'll ever know_

_I still do, willing to let it show_

Aerrow woke a few hours later, hearing Piper calling him through the door - apparently lunch was ready. Saying he'd be there in a few minutes, he placed the old scrapbook back in its place beneath his bed. He quickly wiped away the remnants of his tears, making sure no trace of his moment of weakness was left behind. Sighing, he turned to the window - it was still raining outside. He smiled bitterly - if he couldn't cry, it seemed the clouds would for him. He left the room, bringing up his cheerful masquerade again, putting on that impenetrable mask that he could only take off when he was perfectly alone. The silence he kept his feelings within would kill him eventually, and he knew it, but until that time arrived, he would just hide behind the Aerrow everyone else knew.

_I need a minute just to get to you_

_I feel like I might be getting through_

_Come over and say nothing_

_Silence is everything_

_(shh, silence)_

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Minako: Well, there it is...It probably sucked. Akako Hama, if it sucked, just say so. Anywho, please review!


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